Saturday, January 28, 2012

FtM Sex on Shoenhauser Allee

 


It was in November and it was bloody cold out. Colder than the following December. I had met yet another Female to Male trans guy and he was quite handsome. Very different to "M" as he had been transitioning for years. His breasts had been removed along with the internal female organs. His urethra was redirected to his even more so extended clitoris and his penis was being constructed on his forearm for the next OP. He was very hairy and masculine and there was no question about his gender whatsoever. We started flirting the moment we met. Every time we went out we flirted and we actually became very good friends. Texting each other all day and night...always chatting.

One night we went out and it happened to be amidst my ex and my ex-friend. He was a complete gentleman and stayed by me the whole time. After several drinks later, he asked me if I wanted to make my ex jealous. I said, no, I think us being here together is doing that enough. He said, because I could kiss you. But I could not do it. However, I did suggest us go into the back of the bar away from them and make out. But before we could act upon it, the bar started closing and everyone went out front. I remained inside waiting for my friend to return from the toilet. When he returned I told him to kiss me. He did, vigorously and passionately. Of course, outside the window, the group had seen us.

We scooted out of the bar a little light headed from the kiss and joined the rest of the group. They invited us for pizza around the corner, but he declined the offer and said, he was going to make sure I get home safely. Arm in arm we turned the corner walking towards the tram and train station. Just above the train station is the Schoenhauser Allee mall. It was about 4:30 in the morning and quite fucking cold. We walked along the walk way between the mall store fronts and the bridge to the train itself. He and I looked at each other and started kissing. The next thing I know he pushes my up against the storefront window and kisses me harder. He rubs his body against mine, just like a man with a cock would. This was extremely hot for me...knowing he had no cock, but how sensitive what he did have was. It reminded me of being in the hallway of my ex's.


 

He began touching my tits and rubbing my nipples which were erect anyway from the cold, but extraordinarily turned on...his touch with my breast was also like that of my ex. It is hard to describe, the way the hands softly but forcibly embraced the whole breast and then the gentle stimulation of my nipples, just made me wet and vulnerable to the moment. Not to mention I enjoy public sex! But the next thin I know my belt is on the ground, one jacket is on the ground, and my dress is up over my chest and he is sucking my tits. His lips and his tongue felt amazing. The contrast between warm and wet and the bitter cold air was titillating, no pun intended!  He was thoroughly enjoying exploring my body, getting down on his knees and licking and kissing. He would not let me touch him below, but he loved it when I touched his chest, scratched his back, and played with his nipples.

Hearing him grunt and whisper in my ear how good I feel made the cold go away. I wanted to feel his body against mine, so I lifted my dress higher and opened up his shirt and rubbed my tits with erect nipples all around his chest and stomach. I licked and kissed him and pulled his body closer to mine. He reached down into my panties and the moment his cold soft fingers touched my pussy, she started to drip. He knew exactly how to play with her. Not to hard, not too soft, not too much clit stimulation and how sensitive the vaginal opening was. I started to flow in extacy and I could not help but to howl and moan loudly into the still night. He inserted his fingers bent up towards my g-spot and started pounding and vibrating it and then my knees went weak, my cum rushed out and splashed everywhere with each insertion. His voice whispering in my ear, oh, yah...thats good girl, oh yah your so fucking wet, just sent me over the edge and I could not help but to scream....I am cumming. I could hear it echo down the tracks and through the mall corradore.

In the times my eyes were open, I could make out random people just walking by heading to catch the train for work and the security guard out of the corner of my eyes. I was surprised no one stopped to watch, but I vaguely remember seeing the security guard more than once. he continued to milk me of all of my juices and only stopped when I had nothing left to give....2 hours later.

The next time we had sex was on Thanksgiving at my friends house. This story may be a little more graphic and for some it may be nasty....

Thanksgiving I was not only celebrating my American tradition with turkey, stuffing, mashed tators, and pie, but I was also celebrating getting my Visa to stay in Germany. I was really in the mood to celebrate. I bought 1 bottle of wine and two 1liter bottles of vodka to share. Well since Thanksgiving was an American holiday that falls on a Thursday, most of our German guests did not have it in them to drink quite as much as we Americans had planned to. My friend came to join us later...about 1 bottle of wine for me later. When he arrived I was feeling very good. I had my wine, some gluwein, a few shooters, and a few glasses of vodka on the rocks. The night carried on long after our German guests left. My girl friend, whose apartment it was, myself, and my friend were the only people left. We sat around and talked about music, sang, watched videos online, got onto the topic of what videos were hot. Then I told my friend to show us the porn video he liked the best. We watched that one and a few others and as I sat at his feet, I could feel his leg twitch letting me know he was horny. I then looked at my other friend (female) and could see the desire in her eyes. I looked at him then her and asked if it would be ok with her wife (sleeping in other room) would mind us having a 3-way, so long as he doesn't do anything to her? (My female friend, myself, and her wife had previous agreement that we could fuck each other) She was completely down. So I told her to come down to the floor and started kissing her, then started kissing him. I took her clothes off and started enjoying her nipples in my mouth and kissing her. I removed my shirt and kissed him again. I threw her down on her back and crouched above her kissing her and touching her, while he was behind me undoing my pants. I told him I was on my period and he said he did not care...so I didn't either. He started to finger me from behind and kissing my ass. I continued to play with her, kissing her lips, her tits, and then down to her pussy.

He stopped for a moment and I noticed in my peripherals that he went to smoke a ciggy and watch us. I sucked nd licked on her very sweet shaved pussy and then I started to finger her. I had her straddled over me as I was inside her when he returned and pushed me on top of her. he dug his hand between my shoulder blades and then started finger fucking me hard, then he pulled my pants completely off and pushed my ass up higher into the air. All the while making it hard to maneuver with her. I got thirsty and took a few swigs off the vodka and went back down on her. I must have cut her with my finger nails, because she howled in pain from the sensation of the vodka in my mouth on her pussy. Her wife opened the door and looked in and said something, not sure really and then she left. My friend and I continued on fucking. He had me bent over the bed, the chair, then on the bed with my pussy in the air holding her to his face sucking and licking me. I can not count how many times I came all over him, his face, his arm...everywhere. It was just a massive explosion of water works that we were bathing in. I was fucking me really hard. I remember it hurting, but feeling so good....I think he was attempting to fist me. We stopped for a smoke break after about an hour or so...not sure. Then he started fucking me on the balcony, then on the floor, and back on the bed.

We both lost track of time, but it was daylight out and we eventually stopped and talked a bit. He said he had to go...he had to be to work in 2 hours. I could not imagine going anywhere....I passed out on the bed and didn't even say good bye. I woke up the next day around 2pm. I tried standing up and my pussy hurt to holy hell. I could hardly move. But when I stood up and looked around me, I could not believe what I saw. There was blood and cum stains everywhere but the walls. It looked like a slaughter house. I was mortified to say the least. It was so animistic and erotic, but also so bad....this was my friends apartment, their sheets, their carpet. I stayed in the room for a while to listen to the sounds of the girls walking around in the kitchen. They did not sound upset or pissed off. So I crept into the kitchen submissively and bashfully to face the music. They were surprisingly cheerful and not really bothered by the atrocity that happened in their living room. I could not apologize enough. They said it was ok, they understood....this happens with girls. Then my friends wife wanted to show me something. We walked into the living room and she pointed to a distinct full hand print on the floor. We all started laughing and pointing out all the spots. We all laughed but I was still quite embarrassed at my behavior. We spent the entire rest of the day cleaning by hand the sheets, blankets, and carpets. We even found  spot that we think was my girl friends blood and not mine! Maybe from when I cut her with my finger nails. Who knows! All I know was I was in so much pain, walking down the 5 flights of stairs and sitting on the train home, was the most uncomfortable feeling. But I did it with a smile!


A week or so later, my friend and I found ourselves on Schoenhauser Allee again, but the other side...along the sidewalk. Just out of nowhere we start kissing and I am up against the wall. This time it was around 2am and there were many people walking and riding by, but it still did not stop us. My jackets were off, my top was open and bra was laying on the sidewalk. He grinded himself up against me and finger fucked me like he was standing on a bible only to roger me better...like a biological man would. This encounter was not as long as the first, but it surely didn't lack in intensity, enthusiasm, or water works. I howled and moaned and no passer by was protected from my singing. his fingers inside me just felt so fucking good...I could not help myself.


In the end...I like FtM sex the most of all. The foresight, first hand knowledge combined with the sexual desire and stamina that comes with testosterone makes the equation complete! The attention to detail, body language, and knowing how a woman likes to be touched and knowing how they have always longed to fuck a woman like a man...proves to be the most erotic engagement in my opinion. That is what I said and I aam sticking to it!

Friday, January 27, 2012

FtM, Lesbian, and Hetero sex....what was the best?

For those of you unbeknown to the term FtM it means Female to Male Transition.

Intro to my sex....

For the last 6 years or so, I have lived a life of a lesbian. I had 3 girlfriends and 1 wife in that period of time. I knew I liked the idea of sex with women since I can remember as a young pubescent girl. I came to acknowledge it while in middle school when I would feel the ping in my sex when I saw the girls breasts, ass, and curves while changing in the girls locker room. However, I did not admit it to myself and accept these feelings until I was 17 years old. That is when I had my first pseudo-girlfriend. I say pseudo because we never had sex. It was mostly that of flirtations, looks, kisses, and love notes. I explored a little and had my first lesbian experience during a foursome in my apartment. I was very excited and nervous when it all began. I had a crush on the girl and when the opportunity presented itself...I took it. It was horrible. When I went down on her she tasted of day old sex. It was like her boyfriend had cum inside her that morning and she never cleaned herself. Luckily, amidst the orgy, someone started pounding on the front door and I was saved!

This experience kept me fearful of trying again for some time. I developed a few rules and standards to the women I fucked. Rule 1. If you can't see the bottom of the ocean...don't dive in...this is a good rule for swimming too!! Rule 2. finger test 3. know the hygiene rituals of said girl 4. does she sleep with men? If so, this tends to taint the taste and odor of a woman (prefer lesbians)

For several years later, I had the fantastical thoughts of being with women. When I watched porno, I would only get off if it was lesbian sex. Watching dick sucking and anal did nothing and regular hetero sex was ok. I went through the majority of my adult life having relationships with men and having one night stands, but nothing ever sexually fulfilled me. I would actually have no sex drive at all for months. I thought I had a serious problem mentally and emotionally.


Heterosexual

My last relations with men was in a LTR with a man with whom I loved and thought I would marry. We had good fun sex and it was more regular with him than anyone, but in the 3 three years we were together, we never made love. This  started to develop my desires for being with a woman even more. He always told me it would be ok with him if I had sex with women, but I never had the self confidence to go for it. Our relationship ended because he was cheating on me with a woman he met online. It was a horrible time for me not so much because of the relationship ending or that he was cheating. But more because I felt he was my last hope in having a normal life as a heterosexual woman. This was the make it or break point in my life. I was 28 and had only failed relationships with men. I was not sure how strong I was at that time to face the reality that I may be gay and needed to shit or get off the pot. In my depression, I decided to try and kill myself. I lit candles in the room, took 20 sleeping pills, and covered my head with a plastic bag. Obviously, it  did not work as I am here writing now!

When I woke up in the morning I had a new outlook on life and was ready to face my fears and start a new chapter in my life. I didn't die, so there for I must follow through with destiny. The crazy story about the last man I had a relationship with, or even had sex with until I moved to Berlin, is as follows.... shortly after our break up I hear he is getting married to the girl he cheated on me with. I was completely shocked by the news, a little put out, but mostly shocked. But I got over it quite quickly actually. The shocker came a few months later when I heard he went to prison. It turns out he was on a chat line and an "underage" girl was chatting him up. He met her and was tackled in the front yard by sting operation police and sentenced to 10 years prison for attempted statutory rape and attempted child molestation. All of which was documented on national television..."to catch a predator".

Lesbian        

The next few years I got over my insecurity and started to really enjoy my sex. It turns out I had a natural talent for fucking women and making them cum! My first girlfriend I was with for 1.5 years and in the beginning we had great sex. The first time was in the back of her Lexus behind a gay bar. It was very exciting and in the dead of winter. So cold, we had to turn the car on to keep the heat running. After about 1 hour we heard a knock on the window, but could not see anything from all the fog coating the windows. I quickly pull myself together and get out of the car to find a police officer standing before me. Before I can say anything beyond good evening officer, my girlfriend pops out the other side completely disheveled and fixing her bra and says...hey! Everything is great officer, we were just leaving. This girlfriend turned out to be completely high maintenance and a little emotionally unstable and we agreed to part ways. We have since still remained good friends....and she is still my hairdresser when ever I go to the US. But she was a great first lesbian relationship to learn from.

My next girlfriend turned out to be the girl that used to live beneath me and my last boyfriend..the one now in prison. She was a very experienced lesbian and a dominatrix for fun. We explored many interesting sexual adventures from shaving, bondage, strap-ons, sensory deprivation, and fisting. She was the first to make me squirt and teach me how to make it happen. The most exhilarating experience with her was our trip to Berlin. There we had sex in my friends bed one night. It was the most intense fucking I had had up to that point in my life. After several hours of licking, sucking, and fingering and squirting, she very intimately took her time to begin fisting me. It took about an hour of slowly stroking my my pussy getting her to open up, each small gesture drew her hand deeper and deeper. It was not painful at all. It was loving and very intense, being this filled and by the time she was in, we were sitting in a pool of my cum. I felt bad for my friend though as he was banned from his room and forced to stay in his living room for the night and becuse he himself had not had sex in his own bed yet! Although our sex was very good together most of the time...I had a problem with her hygiene methods and it tended to be her fucking me more than me fucking her and that for me was not enough. So, we ended our relationship and we no longer talk. 

My next lesbian relationship was the most well connected and loving of all. She was not only the best woman, but for at least the first portion of our relationship, the best sex I had had with women....she later became my wife. In the beginning our sex was amazing. We went to festivals and camping together and had a lot of good tent sex. My biggest lesbian fantasy was fulfilled by her one night at one of these festivals. We spent much of the night fucking in our very cold tent. But we were so into what we were doing, we could not feel the cold. I got lost in our sex and all holds became unbarred! I wanted so much to feel her wet pussy rubbing up against mine, so we started to scissor each other and the squirt works went flowing. I was not only turned on in my mind by what was happening, but it felt so good. My sex drive was immediately sparked by this woman and shortly into our relationship, I taught her how to squirt and it became an amazing sport for both of us.

One time in my attempts to seduce her I created a scavenger hunt game. I invited her over and we had a few drinks. I handed her the first of 4 riddles to guide her where she needed to go. She was led somewhere, where she would find a rose and another riddle, then sent to another place to find something sexy for me to wear, then she would get another riddle to find my toy box and choose her weapons so to speak. She laid everything out on the bed that she wanted. She chose my black plastic sheet, rope, and blindfold. All very good choices indeed. I put on the sexy outfit she chose, undressed her and placed her atop the black plastic sheet. I took the rope and strung her arms over her head and affixed the rope to an O ring screwed into the baseboard. Then I sat on top of her and let her look at me as I kissed her lovingly and then blindfolded her. I took my time touching her with different objects from feathers, to hot wax dripping on her, scratches with my nails, spanks on her ass, and my tits and nipples running the course of her body. Then I licked her pussy and fingered her until she came over and over and was lying in her juices. Then I went to the kitchen and got a bottle of champagne I took off the top and took a heavy swig, just before I placed the opening into her pussy...letting some of the cold fizzy beverage into her. Then I licked some more and reinserted the bottle gently into her. After she had her final climax, I shook the bottle and let the contents spew allover her body. Her nipples were hard and I could tell she was a bit cold, so I mounted her to give her some of my warmth and sat on her face and we began to 69. I finally released her from her restraint and took off her blindfold and we both started to roll around in her cum champagne and she then fucked me.

After years of being together...and really together, we started having less and less sex. Restrictions on when and where became the law of the land. Towards the end of our relationship she became what I call, a pillow princess, where I was servicing her, but not being serviced. I was the instigator and the seducer. Then the lesbian bedroom death kicked in. I started to desire hetero sex again, purely for the animal desire aspect. I told her of this, but it never was commented on. We had gotten married 9 months before I moved to Berlin and had sex only 15 times in that period. It frustrated me to no end, but the other 99% of our relationship seemed perfect. But when I arrived in Berlin, I had an affair with an FtM and my whole outlook on the reality of my relationship and sexuality was turned upside down. My wife found out about my affair and ended our relationship and although we love each other deeply still to this day, living so far a apart from each other, left us no arena in which we could work on the problems we had in our relationship. The door is still open to find a away to be together, but at the moment we remain friends and talk regularly. She is very much a part of me and if there was anyone I could see myself growing old with, it would be her.

FtM  

In my 35 years of life and 20 years of sexual experience....I have to say my sexual encounters with FtM's have been the most adventurous, stimulating, and most fulfilling hands down. I think there is something about having the best of both worlds that makes this work best for me. Although, most FtM's might hold offense to this statement. I have been with 2 FtM's and both were at different stages of their transitions and at different emotional levels with themselves. But nonetheless, my opinion on the matter, best of both worlds describes it best to me.

My ex "M", as I have referred to him in previous blogs had just started his transition only a few months before we met. While the second had been transitioning for a few years with hormones, breast and female anatomy removed, but had not had his penis OP. My ex was the most amazing sexual partner I had ever had. The whole thing, the whole idea..the curiosity, the desire to conquer, and severe attraction to each other were all culprits in this intensity. He had not been with anyone sexually nor had the desire to be for over 10 years. Plus, the sex he did have when he did was not the most comfortable for her (at time). Knowing that even currently he was uncomfortable with his body, me being able to be the first to touch him drove my initial desire to have sex with him...the conquering aspect. But it also seemed like a good transition for me from lesbian sex to having sex with a man.

our sex started with the youthful 4-5 hours of flirting, and kissing, touching and grinding as he pushed me up against the wall. For the first time I was seeing how my body was reacting and observing it...here I was very connected to not only him, but to myself in a way I hadn't been before. He made it very clear he was interested in me and he was ok with telling me his boundaries from the beginning and communicating what he liked and didn't like. His one boundary was no penetration. In my eyes, this was completely doable as I never imagined sex with a man with me penetrating him. But I knew his desire to feel like a man and so the way I touched him and seduced him was very much in the way I would a man.

one day I arrived at his house and he was sitting in his chair drinking and talking with me. I was wearing a dress and had a glass of wine in my hand. I slowly placed the glass of wine on the table keeping eye contact on him the whole time. Then I stood before him and just dropped my panties to the ground. He could see nothing, but could only imagine. He said to me in his breaking voice, "that is so sexy." I leaned over him as he looked up at me and started to kiss him. Then I slowly lifted one leg over one side where he could catch just a quick glimpse of my pussy, then the other leg and stood over him. Then I slowly came down and straddled him. I took off his shirt and he loosened his binding to expose his stomach. Then I placed my wet pussy upon his belly so he could feel it close to his cock, but still with enough distance to draw the desire harder. We started kissing and he touched my breasts. The way he cradled them and lightly tweaked my nipples sent shivers through my body all the way to my loins. I decided to tease him a bit by standing up and walking away. I headed to the balcony to smoke a cigarette. As I walked away, I lifted my dress over my head and dropped it to the floor. I stood with my back to him as I lit my cigarette and I could feel the heat from his body draw closer and closer. He grabbed me and started kissing my neck and then tuned me around. We started kissing very heavy on the balcony over looking the main street. I put my cigarette out and turned his back to the street and undid his pants and they dropped to the ground. I reached into his pants and started to play with his dick-clit (extended clitoris from testosterone). He was so fucking wet, he was dripping. I started to rub his dick-clit and hearing his moans and grunts turned me on even more. The exploration of him, him being exposed outside on the balcony and me being the conqueror made the intrigue all the more alluring.

He reached into my pussy and started to play with me and his fingers felt so good. I was longing for his touch between my legs. I could feel myself leaking slowly my own juices as it ran slowly down my legs and then creating a puddle at my feet. The sound of his fingers inside me turned on the water works as the flood began to swell. I told him to take me to his bed...as we entered the house again, we only made it to the hall way, when he pushed himself against me and me against the wall. Finally, I was getting the animal sex I had been craving. I was glad the wall was there to hold me as my knees were starting to give out. We finally make it through the hallway and into his room. We had relinquished all of our clothes in the hallway...all but his binding. He stood before me as I sit wantingly on his bed as he paused. He then slowly took off the device and revealed himself to me. He dove down on top of me and when we felt the feel of our bare flesh against each other, the frenzie began. His need to find a way to rub up on me and stimulate himself and me were at completely the same levels of importance. We spent hours rolling around, trying new positions...acrobats if you will, to get each other off. It was fucking amazing. It was like all those 10 years of pent up sexual tension were being unleashed on me. As I was conquering him in my mind, he was conquering himself. This was a great sexual union of complete exploration to uncharted territories. The fact he felt so comfortable with me to share this experience with me really touched my heart.

After hours in bed, we got up to get a drink in the kitchen. The window was almost the size of the room and it exposed us to the apartments adjacent to us. Again, we could not stop and I sat on the oven as he fucked me like a man would without a cock right there, then down on the kitchen table, down the hallway to his room again. This type of sex was an almost every other day occurrence for 3 months straight. In this time period I lost 15 kilo or 30lbs. Highly aerobic sex with very little time for food. It was exhausting, but we could not stop. Of course, we do not speak any longer. He will always have a huge piece of my heart, the part that allowed me to feel and be felt. The heart that showed me my being....

my second FtM experience will be continued in blog...FTM Sex on Schoenhauser Allee

Discreditation of Love

SO last night I was posed the question as to why I did not seek or desire love?

To answer this...to me love comes in 2 forms and both are equally scarey. The first form comes from the love that allows you to self manipulate and contour yourself to your partner. Over time this contouring changes into an almost complete metamorphosis where you end up becoming a completely different person. Your desires, beliefs, interests, everything starts to no longer be that of your own. This can turn into either a great union, because as much as you meld into your partner, your partner can meld also into you....creating a singular and beautiful entity. Or in my case, it can build resentment, confusion, dissatisfaction, and longing. This is very heartbreaking and led me in particular in a search for self....completely detaching myself from my love.

The second form comes secondary. You find that perfect soul and being that they not only see you as you are, but who you are meant to be...they also allow you to see yourself through them...the way you never knew yourself. This is to me the deepest type of love that determines the lifeline of individuality. This is the kind of love I had with my ex. When this type of love is shattered, it is not only the love that is shattered, it is the self that is shattered and left broken. For me...finding my perfect self and introducing myself to me was the most important chapter in  my life...but then having that ripped from me, changed my outlook on me, what I was able to give and receive from other people, lovers, and partners.

Either way..these forms of love interest me not. I can never open myself up that way to anyone again. But this does not mean I do not long for tenderness, intimacy, and connection with other people. I embraced what I learned about myself through my ex/ ex's and came to realize, although I have a lot to offer someone and am open to what others have to offer me, it comes with limits and at a cost. I am forever closed off from true love or feeling so deeply for another person, but in small doses with my "partners", I can temporarily journey into the portals of love and then retreat there for some time and then leave. But I can not and will not ever allow myself to be vulnerable to the illusion of love just find solace there in the uniqueness of passerby lovers.

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Making an older man very happy aand blush!

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Escort Berlin: My Favorite Partner :)

Most recently actually I had my favorite "partner". I will call him D. D responded to two of my most popular ads, Older Woman seeks Younger Man and Strap on fun. I found his pics very nice and they were not the usual cock shots at all. Although his response was short, it had a level of creativity worth replying back to. Plus, he was circumcised!!! :)

    for you have found!

    A young, good looking, athletic boy toy with short dark hair and dark brown eyes.

    All that is left for you to do is show him the way to the playfield and the games may begin!

    If you really need to know, here are some details: 25 years young, 1.83m / 70kg, circumcised and shaved. xoxo

I responded, So you have never been with an older woman before? Well I would think it would be a bit more enthusiastic than the run of the mill young girl who has no idea what she wants or how her body works. Here is the deal. I am a very sexy older woman, although I do not look like it. Maybe I have drank from the fountain of youth while living a lifetime of experiences! I would love to show you the ways of my world if you have interest. I am a fan of spontaneous sex outdoors, like in the park, against a fence, or a hot fuck in club. Or we can spend an evening physically getting to know how our bodies work together. I have no problem telling you how to pleasure me to show you my enthusiasm, meaning if you press the right buttons, a very sweet nectar is released. I am all yours for 75 euro an hour. Here is a pic of me as you provided one of yourself. I hope to hear from you again and we can make some arrangements to set it off!

    I was once having an experience with an older woman and hence looking forward to the next, as it really spices up things after having sex with girls of my age or slightly younger...

    wow you really are a sexy cougar and I'd love to see how you'd work our bodies to exhaustion, but I don't think that's going to happen this year as the holiday seasons left me with only little money and i have to wait for my paycheck in January ;)

    Are you into roleplay? That kind where you mime an authoritative figure and catch me doing something really bad, hence you'd have to punish me with an overdose of sex?

    What are your likes and dislikes in general?

    Love to hear from you! I just reread your mail and found the words "[...] a very sweet nectar is released." mostly intriguing! Does that mean you are a master of female ejaculation? It may sound foolish and infantile, but since I saw it in a movie once it turned me on so heavily I've been trying to make my female companions gush out their sweets ever since, but somehow they seem uncomfortable with that...

Thank you for your honest and very erotically encouraging responses! Yes, I am very aware of my "nectar sweet" talents and I quite enjoy using them ;-) I also know that most girls are either unable or too uncomfortable with themselves to tap into that resource. But I am not. I choose my clients carefully based on of course looks, gumption, ability to restrain themselves, and demeanor with me during our communications. I am very sorry to hear that you have been left with little financial resources after the holidays, but definitely you and I should talk more when you are prepared in January to procure my talents.

It is a quite hot experience to feel it splatter everywhere...it puts you in another realm! Although I am not into kinky sex, I love active sex and the secret to having this powerful and high extacy moment, has been neglected by most men. Not to sound like a feminist. But in my line of work, I see it over and over... my sex is merely an outlet rather than an opportunity. This is what makes me unique... I give the most exhilarating experience... if the guy could relinquish that control.

So we shall see ;-) 

    Oh we will see!

    Your  mature and eloquent response has just left me speechless and extremely aroused, I had to give in just now ^^

    I'm over excited for our meeting in January and wish you a very joyous new years eve!

Well I do hope I resonate with you...an arousing hum...reverberating throughout your loins! I only can hope you can make it to meet me and we can explore all in detail!

    Ammiee, You really are making me loosing it if you keep on writing seductive mails, i still have work to do and cannot run around with a tent pitched in my pants ^^

    As soon as I can tell when the sails could be set for exploration you will hear me scream for you ;)

    I hope you did not forget about me, since our "meeting" is only three weeks away and I can't wait to feel your legs shaking; you gushing your hot juice all over me, while screaming at the top of your loungs and clinging your nails into my flesh!

    One thing I would like to ask, how familiar are you with role play?

Of course I have not forgotten about you! To answer your question, I am familiar with role playing. However, it is something that I only reserve for regular clients. It requires a trust and a familiarity that can only be acquired over time. I am sorry if this disappoints you. But as role playing really puts aside the persona of the individuals, it takes away from, rather than adding to, what I offer my clients....myself. If I am allowed to be myself, all is able to flow...unless all you want me to do is fake?

    Wow, that is the most honest, sincere and thought provoking answer I ever encountered, and it's making me feel infantile just to have asked.

    I cannot wait to meet the person rendering those ingenious observations and immerse into the self behind it!

 So when are we going to get together and make her flow?

From there, my darling D responded to yet another ad....Strap-on fun!!

    ...you are going to stop when I beg you or don't stop even though I have tears in my eyes?

 So your interested in a little strap-on fun? Well here is how this will work. I will come to yours. You will invite me in. You will lead me to the place where you would like to be fucked. I will undress you and you will undress me and help me put on my my fucking tool and slip a 50euro in the belt. I will bend you over and gently glide my cock into your ass and then I will fuck you until you cum all over. I will get dressed and leave. Completely discrete,quick, and depending on you...painless! If you are interested email me back and we will schedule a time for me to conquer you.

    Evening Aimmee,

    how come everything you describe sounds alluring and seductive even though I'd never thought about wanting to do something like that?!

    You're really raising my expectations ;)

    Guess I'd be more comfortable if we start with something more familiar, where I'm also able to please a goddess like you!

    Do you have anything planned for Sa., 28th of Jan. around 6 pm? I'd love to finally meet you!

    Hi there Aimmee,

    you're welcome, and how more alluring can someone be?

    However I like to not have any images or expectations of how our time together will be or look like, for I am thoroughly convinced you are an extraordinarily passionate, sensual and highly empathic being.

    The notion of dying to oneself in the process of sexual joy with another woman is really what intrigues me.

    I somehow feel we will be able to achieve such a state once our warm bodies are rubbing their hot and sweating skin in unison in an seemingly everlasting flourish motion; your vagina muscles are clenching my member to the threshold of ecstasy; your nails digging deep into my back skin and your teeth stab into my shoulder while we try to catch our breath to the point of no control; diving into a space- and timeless state of bliss the moment you are gushing out your juice, all over our bodies, in a flood of seemingly everlasting joy!

    I am patiently waiting for our encounter...

Wow such an amazing description. I love words and a man that knows how to use them! I love how you can paint the picture so vividly of the most sought after moment of bliss, where 2 can become one as God. I think we could have an amazingly atomically mind blowing encounter together and I look forward to it as well. How long would you like for us to experience our godliness? I want to make sure I am completely prepared, body and soul for this!

    well I have to, if I want to be able to please you on every level perceiveable!

    I'm not sure if it would not be an unnecessary constraint to have our date timeboxed, is there a specific reason for you want to handle it this way? I would have thought it takes as long as it needs and escpecially in an endeavour like this it is not foreseeable how long it will take...

Sorry for the delay in response. I hope that there was no miscommunication on my part. As I am a very sensual, passionate, and adventurous lover...very real lover, I also require payment for my time. I do not wish to put any constraints on our endeavoring high...but all needs to be clear upfront...don't you think. So let me know if you still seek that level of intimacy with me and we shall make all the time we need!

    sorry my fault, i misread your mail and did not see you meant you charge 75 an hour, this puts everything in a different perspective... Well then i guess an hour would be enough for the first time, since I am not sure what to expect as I feel money is your primary objective...

Sorry you think that it is my primary objective! Maybe you should read my blog or if you would like to chat sometime over skype  (aimmee.dudevant)..you would better get to know what my objective is...not far from yours...the perspective and relativity is just slightly different. But I am real...and I am not doing this with any joe shmo that offers or is even willing to pay. I do it in search for something. Lets just see wht you think and go from there!

    Sure! I am not less intrigued, just more careful; but still sure that if what you described is real, it is worth every cent x infinity!

    What's the name of your blog; I'd love to read it and just added you on skype :)

    Thanks....

    not just for the talk but also for making me feel really comfortable with the thought of finally meeting you!

    I try to reschedule for this week/weekend since I really can't run around with this giant tent between my legs any longer...

We rescheduled the date a week earlier. Our conversations on skype proved there was indeed an attraction and comfort ability with each other. He was cute, sweet, sexy, funny, and very very laid back. I knew we would have a great time together.

The day was approaching and in our conversation I asked him if he liked women to dress a certain way? He said, not really...usually when women dressed up in lingerie, it just didn't look right. They just couldn't pull it off. I told him I was thinking of wearing my corset for him, but that would have to see what mood I was in. Because it is true, I am a different person sometimes from day to day. Sometimes I feel introverted, social, silly, cute, sexy, studious...I had no idea what person was going to wake up that day. He had told me he got a contract for work and I was very excited for him, so I decided to bring a bottle of wine to celebrate.

Finally the day of our meeting. I was feeling sexy....score!!! I dared to wear my corset with fishnets and go for the more pin-up look underneath. I spent the day preparing myself..shaving, lotioning, manicuring, and fantasizing about him. When I left, I felt no nerves at all...I was very comfortable with the idea of having a really hot sexual encounter with him. When I arrived and saw him at the door, my heart jumped...he was so fucking hot in real life. He was taller than I thought, his thin beard was very nicely trimmed, he had beautiful skin, and his eyes had a deep glow. He invited me in and he had music going, the lights were dim and he was rolling a joint. His bed was nicely made, two wine glasses set out next to the bed next to a few fun toys along with the money. As I took my coat off, he looked at me and said, wow you are so hot...so much better looking in person. I mean you were hot online, but in person...man! Flattery gets you everything! As I took off my shoes, he left to the kitchen and returned with a plate of mozzarella cheese drizzled with a balsamic reduction. He really is holding true to treating me like a goddess, I thought. 

We took some time to talk and let him finish his joint and he asked if we could get more comfortable? I said sure and stood up and took off my dress as I was looking forward to his reaction to my undergarments. He just sat there with his jaw to the ground and said, OMG! I did a turn around for him to see every angle of my body and then got down on  my knees before him. I told him to touch my corset and feel the tightness of it and explained to him it was made from whale bone and was not a cheep store bought piece. I had had this corset for almost 18 years and it still has kept its form. He loved running his hands along my waste and then to my ass. I asked if he wanted to take it off? He said, no leave it on, but lets take off the bra. Once my breasts were revealed he could do nothing to resist planting his face into my cleavage and sucking my nipples. He removed his shirt so I could feel his nice, youthful and cut body. We started kissing and touching each other and rolling around, until his belt got caught on my fishnets! I told him his pants must go and in return..so did the fishnets. His cock was then planted naturally between my tits and I started to play with his cock, gently titty fucking him. He really had a beautiful circumcised dick...my favorite! It was not too big, but by no means small. Like goldy locks and her porage...it was just right. He pushed me back and started to lick and play with my pussy. She was so hungry for him the whole day, she got very wet, very quick. In the excitement of his fingers and tongue I started to squirt. He was blown away...his reaction was like a little school boy opening up his most desired present on Christmas....although Jewish!

His reaction to me and his touch stimulated my desires so deeply she just kept gushing. He moved his cock close to my pussy as he played with her and let her spew her sweet nectar all over him. He was in heaven and there was no hiding it. He leaned over to me and started kissing me and touching my breast and it was coming to the time when we both needed him inside me. He stopped to get the condom and in his excitement and with wet hands..he could not get the wrapper off fast enough. So I started sucking his cock...all I could hear was him say holy shit!

We got the wrapper off and he penetrated my pussy very easy with the wetness.. He felt so good inside me and the best part was hearing him breathing and moaning. He fucked me while looking into my eyes and then I flipped him over and started to ride him and came again, just before he finally exploded. The first, round did not last very long, but it was sweet as sugar. We took a break and sipped the wine and ate some cheese and of course, he rolled another joint. We talked about what ever..movies and music..and before we knew it, we were fucking again. This time he fucked me from behind and forward with my body raised to the air. We rolled around changing it up until we both climaxed. It was quite lovely, sitting there naked talking and touching, drinking wine and eating cheese. He told me he never really liked laying in bed naked with a woman chatting after sex, butt hat he was really liking it with me. He was relaxed and had no pressure. I enjoyed laying there with him too.  So much, I started playing with his nipples and nibbling on him and then started to suck his dick again...slow and deep and then we grabbed another condom and fucked again...I got on top of him and it was so easy to maneuver with him because of his thin body, I fucked the crap out of him and he came within minutes, but almost simultaneously. It was really a great time with him.

He was passionate, enthusiastic, comfortable and very hot. We started to talk about being hungry and  I said felafel and he was talking about eating something together the next time :) But, he ended up treating me to the best felafel I have had in Berlin thus far. A little whole in the wall Sudanese kebap shop near Schliessisches Tor.  As we parted ways, he reminded me that he wanted to see me again in the first week of February.

I am not sure if he knows how I look forward to that!?

Sunday, January 22, 2012

Worst date...EVER in the history of mankind!

I will start this section of my blog with something that recently happened to tie everythign all together. I recently posted an ad on CL Berlin asking for a guy to take me to the Tiger Lillies Freakshow playing at the Wintergarten Theater until Feb 5th. The ad was titled, Take me to a show?

I am looking for a nice, fun, down to earth handsome man to treat me to a show.
I would really like to see the Tiger Lillies Freakshow, but to be honest, I do not have enough extra money to buy a ticket nor someone to go with if I did. So I thought I would post here and see if someone would be interested in treating me to the show and see where it goes after.
I don't want someone to treat me just because of the we will see after part...I want someone who genuinely would like to go and see the Tiger Lillies.
I am a very attractive and funny girl and am very good company regardless.
Please send a response with a little bit about you and a photo and label it "tiger lillies" so it doesn't go into spam folder and I will get back to you.

Of course I had my usual cock pics sent and total disregard for the actual intention responses....I have a big cock wanna go with me crap. But I had a very interesting answer today.


Hey, im actually working for them next year...but here is the deal, I 
want to go see the show and I actually didn't because I refuse to go  
alone. But really, why would you discredit your gender and ask for a  
guy to pay...? If you want to see them, fine lets see them but you  
really should pay your way. Then you can be assured that nothing will  
happen that you don't want. Real women died to be free, please dont  
forget that.
I honestly could not believe this guy would even think I would want to see the Tiger Lillies with him after this mail. Funny thing is, for those who have known me or have acquired my services, you know that my biggest issue with women and sex or sex in general (not just the act but gender as well), the issue is the lack of communication skills  we have. You only get bad sex when you do not communicate what you want.Same thing with dating or service or anything,  when you don't communicate what you want you don't get it. (punkt) Regardless of that tangent, I was flabbergasted that this guy have the nerve to bring in the (female sex) card on this. Here was my reply...
I am very sorry you find it a discredit to my gender because I ask for a guy to pay for my ticket and go together. And yes as a free woman I have the right to ask if that is what I want...the question that should be asked is why should I have to ask. It is sad to think that a man sees an obligation for anything more because he does pay. I am being open and honest...I do not have enough money to buy my own ticket and I would really like to go. If I find a guy who is willing to invite me and before meeting him I m interested in more...then I am leaving that open...it is all my discretion before I decide to reply. If I do not find the right guy for the response, nothing is lost. Have a nice night.
Unbelievable!! Really I wanted to write him about my last experience on going out on a "real" date. But honestly, pfff it would mean more to you my readers than him. It all comes around at some point....

The Worst Date EVER in mankind...well at least in my 35 years of existence and months of living as a whore!

A few weeks ago I had placed a sincere ad looking for a Romantic Pervert.
Seriously.....I am looking for a lovely man who is charming, respectful, financially secure (stable) who would like to have a long term, uncomplicated, drama free relationship with a woman who is comfortable with herself, secure, knows what she wants, has a fantastic sense of humor, happy with the little things, sexy, has great curves and has great sex, playful, intelligent, and has many interests.

I love a man who can enjoy films (of all genres), can discuss them, enjoys going out and having fun, dancing (electronic music), concerts (rock and classical), restaurants, likes to travel, who is creative, down to earth, realistic, idealistic, educated, spontaneous, great sense of humor, adventurous, likes to cook and eat (spicy and garlic) now put all these great qualities into a young (24-30), fit, white German man who enjoys regular, energetic, open minded, spontaneous, sometimes rigorous, and completely mind blowing sex! Now if that isn't the longest sentence, I don't know what is :)

Come on... I really do not ask too much now! I know you have to exist. Serious replies only. If you respond with a dick pic, without a genuine response, and integrity...you will not get a response from me.

So let's see where this shall take us...yah?


It does get lonely sometimes having a wall round your heart, living a life of a whore, and even though I enjoy what I do, it does take its toll on me....it can really drain me. Sometimes I just put on a facade for these men, although that facade does truly exist within me...it is sometimes very deep inside, not showing its face to the world or to me most of the time. So yes, it does drain me. Sometimes I think, it would be really nice to have some kind of romantic but not overly serious connection with someone form time to time. So that is why I put this ad out.

The response I received was from a decent looking Dutchman (at least his pics were nice) and I liked it. We started a very good dialog about movies and philosophy and he was so far very stimulating and charming. One thing I noticed in the background of his pic, was the meticulousness of his DVD and book collection. This really should have been red flag number one, but I brushed it off as someone who really liked his movies. So, after some correspondences back and forth, he asked me out on a date to a French restaurant close to where I would be coming directly from a client. heehee! I texted him and said, that I would be glad to meet him at this restaurant,   but that I was not a fan of French anything. He responded like a gentleman and said, "I want you to enjoy everything, so meet me at the Strandbad." That night my client never confirmed our meet, so I decided to go on my date early. It was horrible weather, raining freezing rain and windy as all hell. I looked at the maps and thought I knew where I was going. But I was wrong. I got completely lost. I stopped in another restaurant to get out of the weather and texted him. 5 minutes and still no response. I kept waiting until he finally called me asking where I was. He had no clue about the corner I was at and said, "I would come out looking for you, but then I would get wet and lost too!" Turns out, that if I had walked one more street forward, I would  have been there. REALLY?  Red Flag number 2, I would get wet and lost..shit...what is that?

So I look inside the restaurant for a guy sitting by himself and was confused, because I saw no one by himself, nor that looked like him. I started to walk around, making sure I was at the right place and I was. So, I went in and my glasses fogged up, so I had to take them off and search blindly for him. I finally see a guy, not really looking like him sitting alone. I approach the table, put on my glasses and was immediately turned off! Red Flag 3! I did not want to be rude and walk out, so I removed my coats and said hello and sat down. It was him, but he looked different. I think it was his shoulders that turned me off and the proportion of his head to his body...something was just off. Who knows, maybe me..just irritated? So, we started to talk and he asked if I would like a drink? I asked for a glass of wine. After about 15 minutes he asked if we could order, because he needs to eat at a  certain time every day to keep from feeling sick. Sure I said, but I was not hungry really, so I just ordered some nachos to graze on. As we wait for the food, he tells me all about the places he has visited based on location for good running. I thought Jesus Christ really? you go visiting places for vacation based on best jogging locations? I go for...hmmmm culture, food, nightlife, nature, multiple activities, etc. But he goes for jogging? Get me out of here is all I could think.

Thank God the food arrived and I can entertain myself by playing with some gooey cheese for some time. Maybe I should just do all the talking so I do not have to listen to a word he says. But then he started eating. Oh my fuckness.....I had no idea the jogging Dutchman was only a facade to the redneck lumberjack. See...the beautiful thing about European style eating is the gracefulness of how they eat, like they are conductors of an orchestra or like they are playing a Cello...just beautiful! But not him...he used his utensils like he was ready for a boxing match, both hands clenched ready for double fisting. He completely slaughtered the ravioli  that lay helpless on his plate as if it were going to run away. I was absolutely disgusted and distracted from what I was talking about. Red Flag 4

Then he said, "if you want something different to eat, I could go somewhere else after here." I suddenly felt the vomit begin to rise in my throat. The next place I go, will be to the subway station...alone. So I continue to talk because my own company was quite entertaining to myself, just as his slaughtered ravioli was to him. Seemed perfect at the moment. Then he orders another glass of wine for us. We keep talking and then he orders another round. I told him that I was not feeling well and that I thought I was catching a cold. But that was serious and not a joke! He reaches across the table and starts rubbing my arm and then leans forward to touch more on my back. he starts to clear off the items from the table and scootches up further towards me and asks to kiss me. But before I could say anything his lips were enveloped by his lips. I thought for Christ sake...since when did it mean kiss me when a woman says she is feeling sick? I moved back to signal to stop and I thought because he did stop, he caught the hint. But no....he looks at me and says, "I have been wanting to do that for the last 30 min." At this point we had been there for 2 hours. So, um really only 30 minutes ago you felt the passion inside to want to kiss me, I thought. He then asked me to sit next to him. Thank God my friend texted me and could give me an excuse to not pay attention to him as I sat down next to him with my body turned away from him. I thought surely, he would recognize this body language.....or not as he started to kiss my neck and tell me how goo I smell and then go in for another kiss on the lips.

All I could think about was, what could I do to make him lose interest in me? What can I do? I was texting my friend all the while and he suggested that I say my pimp was looking for me, or just fart! I decided I needed a cigarette and confessed to him that I needed one and that I left my pack at home because I knew he hated smoke. He thought instead it was really cute and went for another kiss. I backed away this time and finally he asked, "does this make you uncomfortable?" I said, "yes, this is too fast for me, I do not kiss on the first date." He apologized and suggested we sit on the couch and talk. I really just wanted to go home...I really was not feeling good. But I humored him though. We sat on the couches and he started rubbing my back....ewe make my skin crawl...blah! I had to think quick...what do I do to make him lose interest quick?!!! I took the last gulp of my wine and started talking about my ex and pretended to get upset. He quickly stopped touching me, and his posture suddenly became very unrelaxed. I told him I needed a cigarette and that I need to start heading home because the train would stop running soon. He agreed!!! Thank fucking Jesus. So we walked up to the front to pay the tab when I remembered there was a ciggy machine in the toilet. I decided to just walk back and get me a pack. The damn machine wasn't working...I tried every brand and nothing. I was about to rip the damn thing off the wall. With no luck in getting my much needed fix after all this trauma...I decided to just return to the lumberjack and say goodbye.

When I walked to the front...he was gone! Holy shit...is he really gone? I don't have to deal with him anymore? Suddenly, I did not need a cigarette at all! I put on my headphones and proceeded to walk out and down the street. I was texting my friend when I looked up and saw him returning to the restaurant on his bike. I thought shit...does he really think he has a chance? He came over and I said, hey there you are with a forced smile! He said, "yes here I am. I was wondering what happened to you? I said, "oh? I just went to the toilet and to try and get ciggy's from the machine and it wasn't working " He said, this is embarrassing, but I thought you were trying to get out of paying your share."  My jaw hit the fucking ground and the rage was no longer laying dormant. I said, "excuse me...really? You think I should pay for my share? You asked me out on this date. You continued to order drink after drink for us re you fucking serious?" He said, " well yah. It was really only our first date. I probably should have been more clear about it, but yes where I come from we usually split the bill on the first date." I said, "aha...hence the term DUTCH! Well where I come from, when am man asks a girl out on a date and chooses restaurant..he pays." He said, "I am sorry". I pulled out my wallet and said, "you seriously want the money? Do you have change for 20?" I stuffed it into his hands and put the change into my wallet, when that little fucker went in for another kiss!!!! WTF I told him to get his shitty hands off of me and said...it is sad that you make the woman pay for anything once you realize you will not be getting laid...fuck off!

Thankfully...I never heard from Jasper again!