Anal Plumbing...is this a profession?

machst du auch rimming? ich lasse mir sehr gerne mein poloch mit der zunge verwöhnen. gerne auch zungenanal also reinstecken deiner zunge in mein poloch. ich muss aber dazu sagen das ich sehr stark am anus behaart bin. ich las auch gerne die winde fliegen wobei es auch mal etwas feucht werden könnte da ich unter flatulenz leide. habe heute eine schöne kohlsuppe gegessen.. es sollte also genug wind für dich dabei sein ;) wieviel möchtest du den für diesen service haben?

 

do you also rimm? I love to have my asshole spoiled with the tongue. also like to have you poke your tongue in my butt hole. I must add, however, I am very strong on the hairy anus. I also like to let the wind fly where it sometimes something might get wet because I suffer from flatulence. I have eaten today a wonderful bowl of cabbage soup .. so it should be enough wind for you here;) how much you want to have for this service?

How much would you need to be paid to do this job?

Predilection

My concupiscent nature requires the delicacy driven in man

a capaciousness of acrimonious and sprightly dictation

My ultimate predilection leads only to aqueous carnal knowledge!

specimen for specimen

 

Responses:

alright, Webster - i'll take the bait.
i'm curious as to see what's wrapped around that palaverous brain o' yours. whatcha readin' now'days?

carnally aqueous sounds fun, too - got a big tub? or latenite @ the stadtbad? ;)

If you look just as interesting as you juggle with the words, I would like to meet you. Me, 189cm, blond, 100kg, well educated healthy.....

sehr eloquent, etwas pathetisch aber trotzdem effektiv,
damit hast du schon Mal ein ganz schönen Abtrennung gemacht.

Ich spiele unglaublich gerne mit Wörter,
aber habe dann auch den Absicht dass mein Publikum mich versteht.

Vielleicht gefällt dir das Specimen.
Dann schuaen wir mal.

My rampant rod will need receptive rosy blooms
where hard-driven fieryness will find rapturous release.

And likewise can a muse as you
measure her corporeal joy with mine.

if by
'acrimonious and sprightly dictation'
you mean
that as i slide my hungering cock
up your wet awaiting wantonness,
your sweetly soused sex,
i whisper not sweet,
but spicy little nothings in your ear,
relating how i will
'penetrate you
like the dirty little
whore
you are
splitting asunder
your yearning, gushing,
cunt'
then i might be
your man

Hi.
Forgive me for being unable to use the language of Shakespeare in all of its richness, but I am not a native speaker. It was a real pleasure reading your ad. One seldom finds such a beautiful expression.
I am 27, 1.75m and of slender figure. Open-mindedness and warm-heartedness are often attributed to me.
Especially in German, I love to play with language, melting for concise and melodic texts. In English, it is much more difficult, but said to suffice for enjoyable conversations. It is still unknown if my subtle sense of humour works properly in this language.
But I can assure you that your luscious nature meets a condign ally in me - when I correctly understand what you want.

If this corresponds at least a bit to your preferences, I'd love to hear from you.

Your words were charmingly amiss. I can derive two possible interpretations of your epigram:

1. you want to have sex in and around a well-watered area

2. you wish to be pissed on

I'm guessing the second one's right, oder?

Hi,

Fancy words for such a simple yet complex desire. May I propose that we conduct a meeting to indulge our mutual cravings?

Maybe you are in the mood to discuss such important matters on a Friday evening whilst consuming delicious beverages?

If you are willing, I know quite the right location for such an occasion.

P.S.: Attached to this letter, you will find a picture as required. I will include no picture of my manhood, for if I had to show you my assets in such a profane way, I'd have to include a picture of my tongue and my hands, too. And that would be quite bizarre, wouldn't it?

Evening Madame,

Your predilection suggests rather a penchant for puerile proclamations; perhaps that's the port's pervading precipitation through my thoracic.

I imagine you'd rather end what you perceive to be predation on the part of the pugilists and pusillanimous towards your pulchritude. That being said, that portends to you preferring gentlemen who are just that: gentle but also men.

I won't claim to be either, but I've heard that I am. If you'd like, I can attach a list of references (those being ex-girlfriends) who might stake that claim.

In any case, I'm traveling to Berlin this weekend, I arrive Friday morning, and I'd fancy getting in trouble with a rad gal. We can divulge our details auf Deutsch if that's a dalliance to your druthers, but your diction so delighted me in the language of the Isles, that I'd be distraught if we didn't abandon that old chestnut.