FtM Sex on Shoenhauser Allee

 

It was in November and it was bloody cold out. Colder than the following December. I had met yet another Female to Male trans guy and he was quite handsome. Very different to "M" as he had been transitioning for years. His breasts had been removed along with the internal female organs. His urethra was redirected to his even more so extended clitoris and his penis was being constructed on his forearm for the next OP. He was very hairy and masculine and there was no question about his gender whatsoever. We started flirting the moment we met. Every time we went out we flirted and we actually became very good friends. Texting each other all day and night...always chatting.

One night we went out and it happened to be amidst my ex and my ex-friend. He was a complete gentleman and stayed by me the whole time. After several drinks later, he asked me if I wanted to make my ex jealous. I said, no, I think us being here together is doing that enough. He said, because I could kiss you. But I could not do it. However, I did suggest us go into the back of the bar away from them and make out. But before we could act upon it, the bar started closing and everyone went out front. I remained inside waiting for my friend to return from the toilet. When he returned I told him to kiss me. He did, vigorously and passionately. Of course, outside the window, the group had seen us.

We scooted out of the bar a little light headed from the kiss and joined the rest of the group. They invited us for pizza around the corner, but he declined the offer and said, he was going to make sure I get home safely. Arm in arm we turned the corner walking towards the tram and train station. Just above the train station is the Schoenhauser Allee mall. It was about 4:30 in the morning and quite fucking cold. We walked along the walk way between the mall store fronts and the bridge to the train itself. He and I looked at each other and started kissing. The next thing I know he pushes my up against the storefront window and kisses me harder. He rubs his body against mine, just like a man with a cock would. This was extremely hot for me...knowing he had no cock, but how sensitive what he did have was. It reminded me of being in the hallway of my ex's.

 

He began touching my tits and rubbing my nipples which were erect anyway from the cold, but extraordinarily turned on...his touch with my breast was also like that of my ex. It is hard to describe, the way the hands softly but forcibly embraced the whole breast and then the gentle stimulation of my nipples, just made me wet and vulnerable to the moment. Not to mention I enjoy public sex! But the next thin I know my belt is on the ground, one jacket is on the ground, and my dress is up over my chest and he is sucking my tits. His lips and his tongue felt amazing. The contrast between warm and wet and the bitter cold air was titillating, no pun intended!  He was thoroughly enjoying exploring my body, getting down on his knees and licking and kissing. He would not let me touch him below, but he loved it when I touched his chest, scratched his back, and played with his nipples.

Hearing him grunt and whisper in my ear how good I feel made the cold go away. I wanted to feel his body against mine, so I lifted my dress higher and opened up his shirt and rubbed my tits with erect nipples all around his chest and stomach. I licked and kissed him and pulled his body closer to mine. He reached down into my panties and the moment his cold soft fingers touched my pussy, she started to drip. He knew exactly how to play with her. Not to hard, not too soft, not too much clit stimulation and how sensitive the vaginal opening was. I started to flow in extacy and I could not help but to howl and moan loudly into the still night. He inserted his fingers bent up towards my g-spot and started pounding and vibrating it and then my knees went weak, my cum rushed out and splashed everywhere with each insertion. His voice whispering in my ear, oh, yah...thats good girl, oh yah your so fucking wet, just sent me over the edge and I could not help but to scream....I am cumming. I could hear it echo down the tracks and through the mall corradore.

In the times my eyes were open, I could make out random people just walking by heading to catch the train for work and the security guard out of the corner of my eyes. I was surprised no one stopped to watch, but I vaguely remember seeing the security guard more than once. he continued to milk me of all of my juices and only stopped when I had nothing left to give....2 hours later.

The next time we had sex was on Thanksgiving at my friends house. This story may be a little more graphic and for some it may be nasty....

Thanksgiving I was not only celebrating my American tradition with turkey, stuffing, mashed tators, and pie, but I was also celebrating getting my Visa to stay in Germany. I was really in the mood to celebrate. I bought 1 bottle of wine and two 1liter bottles of vodka to share. Well since Thanksgiving was an American holiday that falls on a Thursday, most of our German guests did not have it in them to drink quite as much as we Americans had planned to. My friend came to join us later...about 1 bottle of wine for me later. When he arrived I was feeling very good. I had my wine, some gluwein, a few shooters, and a few glasses of vodka on the rocks. The night carried on long after our German guests left. My girl friend, whose apartment it was, myself, and my friend were the only people left. We sat around and talked about music, sang, watched videos online, got onto the topic of what videos were hot. Then I told my friend to show us the porn video he liked the best. We watched that one and a few others and as I sat at his feet, I could feel his leg twitch letting me know he was horny. I then looked at my other friend (female) and could see the desire in her eyes. I looked at him then her and asked if it would be ok with her wife (sleeping in other room) would mind us having a 3-way, so long as he doesn't do anything to her? (My female friend, myself, and her wife had previous agreement that we could fuck each other) She was completely down. So I told her to come down to the floor and started kissing her, then started kissing him. I took her clothes off and started enjoying her nipples in my mouth and kissing her. I removed my shirt and kissed him again. I threw her down on her back and crouched above her kissing her and touching her, while he was behind me undoing my pants. I told him I was on my period and he said he did not care...so I didn't either. He started to finger me from behind and kissing my ass. I continued to play with her, kissing her lips, her tits, and then down to her pussy.

He stopped for a moment and I noticed in my peripherals that he went to smoke a ciggy and watch us. I sucked nd licked on her very sweet shaved pussy and then I started to finger her. I had her straddled over me as I was inside her when he returned and pushed me on top of her. he dug his hand between my shoulder blades and then started finger fucking me hard, then he pulled my pants completely off and pushed my ass up higher into the air. All the while making it hard to maneuver with her. I got thirsty and took a few swigs off the vodka and went back down on her. I must have cut her with my finger nails, because she howled in pain from the sensation of the vodka in my mouth on her pussy. Her wife opened the door and looked in and said something, not sure really and then she left. My friend and I continued on fucking. He had me bent over the bed, the chair, then on the bed with my pussy in the air holding her to his face sucking and licking me. I can not count how many times I came all over him, his face, his arm...everywhere. It was just a massive explosion of water works that we were bathing in. I was fucking me really hard. I remember it hurting, but feeling so good....I think he was attempting to fist me. We stopped for a smoke break after about an hour or so...not sure. Then he started fucking me on the balcony, then on the floor, and back on the bed.

We both lost track of time, but it was daylight out and we eventually stopped and talked a bit. He said he had to go...he had to be to work in 2 hours. I could not imagine going anywhere....I passed out on the bed and didn't even say good bye. I woke up the next day around 2pm. I tried standing up and my pussy hurt to holy hell. I could hardly move. But when I stood up and looked around me, I could not believe what I saw. There was blood and cum stains everywhere but the walls. It looked like a slaughter house. I was mortified to say the least. It was so animistic and erotic, but also so bad....this was my friends apartment, their sheets, their carpet. I stayed in the room for a while to listen to the sounds of the girls walking around in the kitchen. They did not sound upset or pissed off. So I crept into the kitchen submissively and bashfully to face the music. They were surprisingly cheerful and not really bothered by the atrocity that happened in their living room. I could not apologize enough. They said it was ok, they understood....this happens with girls. Then my friends wife wanted to show me something. We walked into the living room and she pointed to a distinct full hand print on the floor. We all started laughing and pointing out all the spots. We all laughed but I was still quite embarrassed at my behavior. We spent the entire rest of the day cleaning by hand the sheets, blankets, and carpets. We even found  spot that we think was my girl friends blood and not mine! Maybe from when I cut her with my finger nails. Who knows! All I know was I was in so much pain, walking down the 5 flights of stairs and sitting on the train home, was the most uncomfortable feeling. But I did it with a smile!

A week or so later, my friend and I found ourselves on Schoenhauser Allee again, but the other side...along the sidewalk. Just out of nowhere we start kissing and I am up against the wall. This time it was around 2am and there were many people walking and riding by, but it still did not stop us. My jackets were off, my top was open and bra was laying on the sidewalk. He grinded himself up against me and finger fucked me like he was standing on a bible only to roger me better...like a biological man would. This encounter was not as long as the first, but it surely didn't lack in intensity, enthusiasm, or water works. I howled and moaned and no passer by was protected from my singing. his fingers inside me just felt so fucking good...I could not help myself.

In the end...I like FtM sex the most of all. The foresight, first hand knowledge combined with the sexual desire and stamina that comes with testosterone makes the equation complete! The attention to detail, body language, and knowing how a woman likes to be touched and knowing how they have always longed to fuck a woman like a man...proves to be the most erotic engagement in my opinion. That is what I said and I aam sticking to it!

FtM, Lesbian, and Hetero sex....what was the best?

For those of you unbeknown to the term FtM it means Female to Male Transition.

Intro to my sex....

For the last 6 years or so, I have lived a life of a lesbian. I had 3 girlfriends and 1 wife in that period of time. I knew I liked the idea of sex with women since I can remember as a young pubescent girl. I came to acknowledge it while in middle school when I would feel the ping in my sex when I saw the girls breasts, ass, and curves while changing in the girls locker room. However, I did not admit it to myself and accept these feelings until I was 17 years old. That is when I had my first pseudo-girlfriend. I say pseudo because we never had sex. It was mostly that of flirtations, looks, kisses, and love notes. I explored a little and had my first lesbian experience during a foursome in my apartment. I was very excited and nervous when it all began. I had a crush on the girl and when the opportunity presented itself...I took it. It was horrible. When I went down on her she tasted of day old sex. It was like her boyfriend had cum inside her that morning and she never cleaned herself. Luckily, amidst the orgy, someone started pounding on the front door and I was saved!

This experience kept me fearful of trying again for some time. I developed a few rules and standards to the women I fucked. Rule 1. If you can't see the bottom of the ocean...don't dive in...this is a good rule for swimming too!! Rule 2. finger test 3. know the hygiene rituals of said girl 4. does she sleep with men? If so, this tends to taint the taste and odor of a woman (prefer lesbians)

For several years later, I had the fantastical thoughts of being with women. When I watched porno, I would only get off if it was lesbian sex. Watching dick sucking and anal did nothing and regular hetero sex was ok. I went through the majority of my adult life having relationships with men and having one night stands, but nothing ever sexually fulfilled me. I would actually have no sex drive at all for months. I thought I had a serious problem mentally and emotionally.

Heterosexual

My last relations with men was in a LTR with a man with whom I loved and thought I would marry. We had good fun sex and it was more regular with him than anyone, but in the 3 three years we were together, we never made love. This  started to develop my desires for being with a woman even more. He always told me it would be ok with him if I had sex with women, but I never had the self confidence to go for it. Our relationship ended because he was cheating on me with a woman he met online. It was a horrible time for me not so much because of the relationship ending or that he was cheating. But more because I felt he was my last hope in having a normal life as a heterosexual woman. This was the make it or break point in my life. I was 28 and had only failed relationships with men. I was not sure how strong I was at that time to face the reality that I may be gay and needed to shit or get off the pot. In my depression, I decided to try and kill myself. I lit candles in the room, took 20 sleeping pills, and covered my head with a plastic bag. Obviously, it  did not work as I am here writing now!

When I woke up in the morning I had a new outlook on life and was ready to face my fears and start a new chapter in my life. I didn't die, so there for I must follow through with destiny. The crazy story about the last man I had a relationship with, or even had sex with until I moved to Berlin, is as follows.... shortly after our break up I hear he is getting married to the girl he cheated on me with. I was completely shocked by the news, a little put out, but mostly shocked. But I got over it quite quickly actually. The shocker came a few months later when I heard he went to prison. It turns out he was on a chat line and an "underage" girl was chatting him up. He met her and was tackled in the front yard by sting operation police and sentenced to 10 years prison for attempted statutory rape and attempted child molestation. All of which was documented on national television..."to catch a predator".

Lesbian        

The next few years I got over my insecurity and started to really enjoy my sex. It turns out I had a natural talent for fucking women and making them cum! My first girlfriend I was with for 1.5 years and in the beginning we had great sex. The first time was in the back of her Lexus behind a gay bar. It was very exciting and in the dead of winter. So cold, we had to turn the car on to keep the heat running. After about 1 hour we heard a knock on the window, but could not see anything from all the fog coating the windows. I quickly pull myself together and get out of the car to find a police officer standing before me. Before I can say anything beyond good evening officer, my girlfriend pops out the other side completely disheveled and fixing her bra and says...hey! Everything is great officer, we were just leaving. This girlfriend turned out to be completely high maintenance and a little emotionally unstable and we agreed to part ways. We have since still remained good friends....and she is still my hairdresser when ever I go to the US. But she was a great first lesbian relationship to learn from.

My next girlfriend turned out to be the girl that used to live beneath me and my last boyfriend..the one now in prison. She was a very experienced lesbian and a dominatrix for fun. We explored many interesting sexual adventures from shaving, bondage, strap-ons, sensory deprivation, and fisting. She was the first to make me squirt and teach me how to make it happen. The most exhilarating experience with her was our trip to Berlin. There we had sex in my friends bed one night. It was the most intense fucking I had had up to that point in my life. After several hours of licking, sucking, and fingering and squirting, she very intimately took her time to begin fisting me. It took about an hour of slowly stroking my my pussy getting her to open up, each small gesture drew her hand deeper and deeper. It was not painful at all. It was loving and very intense, being this filled and by the time she was in, we were sitting in a pool of my cum. I felt bad for my friend though as he was banned from his room and forced to stay in his living room for the night and becuse he himself had not had sex in his own bed yet! Although our sex was very good together most of the time...I had a problem with her hygiene methods and it tended to be her fucking me more than me fucking her and that for me was not enough. So, we ended our relationship and we no longer talk. 

My next lesbian relationship was the most well connected and loving of all. She was not only the best woman, but for at least the first portion of our relationship, the best sex I had had with women....she later became my wife. In the beginning our sex was amazing. We went to festivals and camping together and had a lot of good tent sex. My biggest lesbian fantasy was fulfilled by her one night at one of these festivals. We spent much of the night fucking in our very cold tent. But we were so into what we were doing, we could not feel the cold. I got lost in our sex and all holds became unbarred! I wanted so much to feel her wet pussy rubbing up against mine, so we started to scissor each other and the squirt works went flowing. I was not only turned on in my mind by what was happening, but it felt so good. My sex drive was immediately sparked by this woman and shortly into our relationship, I taught her how to squirt and it became an amazing sport for both of us.

One time in my attempts to seduce her I created a scavenger hunt game. I invited her over and we had a few drinks. I handed her the first of 4 riddles to guide her where she needed to go. She was led somewhere, where she would find a rose and another riddle, then sent to another place to find something sexy for me to wear, then she would get another riddle to find my toy box and choose her weapons so to speak. She laid everything out on the bed that she wanted. She chose my black plastic sheet, rope, and blindfold. All very good choices indeed. I put on the sexy outfit she chose, undressed her and placed her atop the black plastic sheet. I took the rope and strung her arms over her head and affixed the rope to an O ring screwed into the baseboard. Then I sat on top of her and let her look at me as I kissed her lovingly and then blindfolded her. I took my time touching her with different objects from feathers, to hot wax dripping on her, scratches with my nails, spanks on her ass, and my tits and nipples running the course of her body. Then I licked her pussy and fingered her until she came over and over and was lying in her juices. Then I went to the kitchen and got a bottle of champagne I took off the top and took a heavy swig, just before I placed the opening into her pussy...letting some of the cold fizzy beverage into her. Then I licked some more and reinserted the bottle gently into her. After she had her final climax, I shook the bottle and let the contents spew allover her body. Her nipples were hard and I could tell she was a bit cold, so I mounted her to give her some of my warmth and sat on her face and we began to 69. I finally released her from her restraint and took off her blindfold and we both started to roll around in her cum champagne and she then fucked me.

After years of being together...and really together, we started having less and less sex. Restrictions on when and where became the law of the land. Towards the end of our relationship she became what I call, a pillow princess, where I was servicing her, but not being serviced. I was the instigator and the seducer. Then the lesbian bedroom death kicked in. I started to desire hetero sex again, purely for the animal desire aspect. I told her of this, but it never was commented on. We had gotten married 9 months before I moved to Berlin and had sex only 15 times in that period. It frustrated me to no end, but the other 99% of our relationship seemed perfect. But when I arrived in Berlin, I had an affair with an FtM and my whole outlook on the reality of my relationship and sexuality was turned upside down. My wife found out about my affair and ended our relationship and although we love each other deeply still to this day, living so far a apart from each other, left us no arena in which we could work on the problems we had in our relationship. The door is still open to find a away to be together, but at the moment we remain friends and talk regularly. She is very much a part of me and if there was anyone I could see myself growing old with, it would be her.

FtM  

In my 35 years of life and 20 years of sexual experience....I have to say my sexual encounters with FtM's have been the most adventurous, stimulating, and most fulfilling hands down. I think there is something about having the best of both worlds that makes this work best for me. Although, most FtM's might hold offense to this statement. I have been with 2 FtM's and both were at different stages of their transitions and at different emotional levels with themselves. But nonetheless, my opinion on the matter, best of both worlds describes it best to me.

My ex "M", as I have referred to him in previous blogs had just started his transition only a few months before we met. While the second had been transitioning for a few years with hormones, breast and female anatomy removed, but had not had his penis OP. My ex was the most amazing sexual partner I had ever had. The whole thing, the whole idea..the curiosity, the desire to conquer, and severe attraction to each other were all culprits in this intensity. He had not been with anyone sexually nor had the desire to be for over 10 years. Plus, the sex he did have when he did was not the most comfortable for her (at time). Knowing that even currently he was uncomfortable with his body, me being able to be the first to touch him drove my initial desire to have sex with him...the conquering aspect. But it also seemed like a good transition for me from lesbian sex to having sex with a man.

our sex started with the youthful 4-5 hours of flirting, and kissing, touching and grinding as he pushed me up against the wall. For the first time I was seeing how my body was reacting and observing it...here I was very connected to not only him, but to myself in a way I hadn't been before. He made it very clear he was interested in me and he was ok with telling me his boundaries from the beginning and communicating what he liked and didn't like. His one boundary was no penetration. In my eyes, this was completely doable as I never imagined sex with a man with me penetrating him. But I knew his desire to feel like a man and so the way I touched him and seduced him was very much in the way I would a man.

one day I arrived at his house and he was sitting in his chair drinking and talking with me. I was wearing a dress and had a glass of wine in my hand. I slowly placed the glass of wine on the table keeping eye contact on him the whole time. Then I stood before him and just dropped my panties to the ground. He could see nothing, but could only imagine. He said to me in his breaking voice, "that is so sexy." I leaned over him as he looked up at me and started to kiss him. Then I slowly lifted one leg over one side where he could catch just a quick glimpse of my pussy, then the other leg and stood over him. Then I slowly came down and straddled him. I took off his shirt and he loosened his binding to expose his stomach. Then I placed my wet pussy upon his belly so he could feel it close to his cock, but still with enough distance to draw the desire harder. We started kissing and he touched my breasts. The way he cradled them and lightly tweaked my nipples sent shivers through my body all the way to my loins. I decided to tease him a bit by standing up and walking away. I headed to the balcony to smoke a cigarette. As I walked away, I lifted my dress over my head and dropped it to the floor. I stood with my back to him as I lit my cigarette and I could feel the heat from his body draw closer and closer. He grabbed me and started kissing my neck and then tuned me around. We started kissing very heavy on the balcony over looking the main street. I put my cigarette out and turned his back to the street and undid his pants and they dropped to the ground. I reached into his pants and started to play with his dick-clit (extended clitoris from testosterone). He was so fucking wet, he was dripping. I started to rub his dick-clit and hearing his moans and grunts turned me on even more. The exploration of him, him being exposed outside on the balcony and me being the conqueror made the intrigue all the more alluring.

He reached into my pussy and started to play with me and his fingers felt so good. I was longing for his touch between my legs. I could feel myself leaking slowly my own juices as it ran slowly down my legs and then creating a puddle at my feet. The sound of his fingers inside me turned on the water works as the flood began to swell. I told him to take me to his bed...as we entered the house again, we only made it to the hall way, when he pushed himself against me and me against the wall. Finally, I was getting the animal sex I had been craving. I was glad the wall was there to hold me as my knees were starting to give out. We finally make it through the hallway and into his room. We had relinquished all of our clothes in the hallway...all but his binding. He stood before me as I sit wantingly on his bed as he paused. He then slowly took off the device and revealed himself to me. He dove down on top of me and when we felt the feel of our bare flesh against each other, the frenzie began. His need to find a way to rub up on me and stimulate himself and me were at completely the same levels of importance. We spent hours rolling around, trying new positions...acrobats if you will, to get each other off. It was fucking amazing. It was like all those 10 years of pent up sexual tension were being unleashed on me. As I was conquering him in my mind, he was conquering himself. This was a great sexual union of complete exploration to uncharted territories. The fact he felt so comfortable with me to share this experience with me really touched my heart.

After hours in bed, we got up to get a drink in the kitchen. The window was almost the size of the room and it exposed us to the apartments adjacent to us. Again, we could not stop and I sat on the oven as he fucked me like a man would without a cock right there, then down on the kitchen table, down the hallway to his room again. This type of sex was an almost every other day occurrence for 3 months straight. In this time period I lost 15 kilo or 30lbs. Highly aerobic sex with very little time for food. It was exhausting, but we could not stop. Of course, we do not speak any longer. He will always have a huge piece of my heart, the part that allowed me to feel and be felt. The heart that showed me my being....

my second FtM experience will be continued in blog...FTM Sex on Schoenhauser Allee

Discreditation of Love

SO last night I was posed the question as to why I did not seek or desire love?

To answer this...to me love comes in 2 forms and both are equally scarey. The first form comes from the love that allows you to self manipulate and contour yourself to your partner. Over time this contouring changes into an almost complete metamorphosis where you end up becoming a completely different person. Your desires, beliefs, interests, everything starts to no longer be that of your own. This can turn into either a great union, because as much as you meld into your partner, your partner can meld also into you....creating a singular and beautiful entity. Or in my case, it can build resentment, confusion, dissatisfaction, and longing. This is very heartbreaking and led me in particular in a search for self....completely detaching myself from my love.

The second form comes secondary. You find that perfect soul and being that they not only see you as you are, but who you are meant to be...they also allow you to see yourself through them...the way you never knew yourself. This is to me the deepest type of love that determines the lifeline of individuality. This is the kind of love I had with my ex. When this type of love is shattered, it is not only the love that is shattered, it is the self that is shattered and left broken. For me...finding my perfect self and introducing myself to me was the most important chapter in  my life...but then having that ripped from me, changed my outlook on me, what I was able to give and receive from other people, lovers, and partners.

Either way..these forms of love interest me not. I can never open myself up that way to anyone again. But this does not mean I do not long for tenderness, intimacy, and connection with other people. I embraced what I learned about myself through my ex/ ex's and came to realize, although I have a lot to offer someone and am open to what others have to offer me, it comes with limits and at a cost. I am forever closed off from true love or feeling so deeply for another person, but in small doses with my "partners", I can temporarily journey into the portals of love and then retreat there for some time and then leave. But I can not and will not ever allow myself to be vulnerable to the illusion of love just find solace there in the uniqueness of passerby lovers.

Making an older man very happy aand blush!

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.